he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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