the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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