fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
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