put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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