Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
That's intense
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
