Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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