You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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