the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
