Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law