The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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