My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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