he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
