if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
