I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants