lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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