You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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