please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
