I just pynch a tree in the face
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
