conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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