why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
