I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
