i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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