Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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