hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
