Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Randomize
