She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
