Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
