after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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