We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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