Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the night ended with taco bell and tears
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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