basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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