You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
