Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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