If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
