David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
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