every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I FOUND THE LEGS
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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