He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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