Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
