We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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