I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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