I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
