One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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