Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
