Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
