Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.