Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much

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(609): We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much http://tfl.nu/4hfy

Replies (17) Good night (1530) Bad night (3734)
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(607): View more from New York

She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle

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(607): She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle http://tfl.nu/wl70

Replies (9) Good night (3939) Bad night (1201)
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(785): View more from Kansas

this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..

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(785): this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car.. http://tfl.nu/jqo1

Replies (5) Good night (783) Bad night (3118)
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(916): View more from California

I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�

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(916): I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished� http://tfl.nu/f0m1

Replies (7) Good night (1014) Bad night (698)
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(406): View more from Montana

we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig

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(406): we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig http://tfl.nu/68f1

Replies (7) Good night (643) Bad night (2042)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it

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(+44): He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it http://tfl.nu/dp2q

Replies (3) Good night (1713) Bad night (697)
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(787): View more from Puerto Rico

Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM

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(787): Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM http://tfl.nu/4phi

Replies (17) Good night (1625) Bad night (578)
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(619): View more from California

I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!

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(619): I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends! http://tfl.nu/6jqq

Replies (5) Good night (602) Bad night (890)
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(473): View more from Grenada-Carib

She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!

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(473): She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?! http://tfl.nu/amuq

Replies (5) Good night (640) Bad night (502)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.

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(973): My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late. http://tfl.nu/h56e

Replies (3) Good night (1164) Bad night (396)
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(585): View more from New York

I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away

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(585): I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away http://tfl.nu/yv3a

Replies (2) Good night (331) Bad night (593)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?

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(+44): He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks? http://tfl.nu/sa4o

Replies (8) Good night (812) Bad night (429)
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(850): View more from Florida

So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street

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(850): So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street http://tfl.nu/mxrn

Replies (3) Good night (792) Bad night (440)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.

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(724): Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins. http://tfl.nu/ixo6

Replies (2) Good night (822) Bad night (253)
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(630): View more from Illinois

Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.

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(630): Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me. http://tfl.nu/xyws

Replies (0) Good night (170) Bad night (226)

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