Please, let me fuck your mom
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Randomize