im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
