are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
