Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
