She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
